Friday, May 29, 2009

water fun in CO

It requires some creativity because the weather changes every 5 minutes here! It hasn't gotten above 70 or so for a couple weeks but the girls are waiting to do regular summer activities. So we came up a solution. Water fun....

followed up by getting warmed back up! 

Wednesday, May 27, 2009


Madeline has been averaging 5 hours a sleep for days now. I am going to stop all meds today, they are not working and I suspect one is making the problem worse. Our doc informed us yesterday that she can't help us any longer, we have to go to a child physiologist next. We have one that we used over the summer, fall, winter for play therapy sessions. I was not impressed with him and have not contacted him regarding this latest anxiety issue. We got a referral to another physiologist, I've heard his name around town before, all very good things. I was warned that he was booked out until August, but for once luck was on my side. I called directly after a cancellation so I go in next week for an intake appointment about Madeline. 

I am starting to get quite concerned, I have been before, but Madeline is getting depressed. I spend all my time intervening between her and Gabrielle because Madeline is being mean. Doing things like stopping on her feet, slamming her hands into things, incidents that happened at times before, but now she is doing them all day long and is unfazed by consequences. Or Madeline is melting down into a puddle on the floor every two seconds because she is so tired. She spent half the weekend just lying around, absolutely not normal for her. She wouldn't eat one day saying she was too tired to and she keeps complaining that her stomach hurts. She was up all last night. She started off in downstairs with Ryan and Gabrielle, by 10:30 was up in my room just lying there. She watched a movie in the room off and on during the night. I didn't catch her actually sleeping until 4am, she just quietly laid there most of the time. For a child like her, quietly lying there is not a good thing. 

Monday, May 25, 2009

one month old

Julian has turned out to be a easy going baby. He doesn't nurse nearly as often as the girls did, absolutely refuses to comfort suck, fussing until someone finds a binky for him. He will sleep in the swing for some naps, liking to be held for the rest of course. He sleeps best the first part of the night if he isn't in my arms but laying next to me. Some nights I wake up to find little eyes shining back at me, he is just lying there content as could be. 

He is looking like quite the old man with the receding hair on top!

Friday, May 22, 2009

why I cried today

Do you see it! Isn't it absolutely beautiful? She wrote her name. From memory, unprompted, by herself. That is HUGE, and all credit goes to M. the wonderful language therapist that we have been seeing 5 days a week. 

Thursday, May 21, 2009

no magic answer

Apparently there isn't one for child insomnia. Meds are not working well for her. The prescription ones make her tired, but doesn't stop the nights wakings. They leave me with a child who still wakes up repeatedly but is unable to stay awake which is even worse then before. Now she'll wake up for a few minutes, then dooze off, wake up again, repeat many, many times. She is too tired to watch TV even. I'm waiting on the pedi to call me back about Gabrielle's cough (yep, she still has that chronic cough from Jan, everyone is at a loss as to why it won't go away), and then we'll talk about upping the dose. 

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

round two of meds

Benadryl stopped working last night. I was shocked it even worked for a couple nights to begin with. I'm breaking out the other meds tonight, wish us luck!

Sunday, May 17, 2009

meds, therapy, and school

The docs had two suggestions for us. We got a script for Clonidine which is a blood pressure med, it is used at low doses for child insomnia. They wanted us to try Benadryl first though. The only reason I had never tried it before because I've given it to Madeline before for hives and never noticed sleepiness as a side effect, she was still running around like she always does. I've given it to her the last two nights and she has slept for the most part. I'm not holding my breath that it really the Benadryl or the fact that she is just utterly exhausted. She thinks she is getting "real meds" and now she is sleeping is also interesting info. 

Language therapy is going wonderfully. She has completed two weeks already and loves it. I can't remember if I post back when she got accepted to the private school officially, but yes she is in. Now the next issue begins. The school is having to reorganize the grade due to budget issues. K will now be a stand alone grade, 1st and 2nd will now be combined. The wonderful teacher that would of Madeline's teacher will be the K teacher. The other teacher I have not met but have been told from other parents that she is great as well. Madeline met the K teacher and loved her. They gave us the option of putting Madeline in either K or 1st, we have the summer to decide, and can change our minds later if it turns out to be a bad fit. The main issue with 1st grade besides she will be with more advanced students, is that in that both 1st and 2nd grades, there is only 1 girl. That student is in 2nd grade and is quite gifted, I only mention this because there are no other girls in the class and Madeline would obviously be a much different student then her. 

There are several girls in K so that is not an issue. My biggest concern is holding her back if I don't have to. Madeline isn't a young student in her current grade to begin with, her b-day is only 3 months after the cut date. I don't want her to be oldest student in her grade by at least a year. I'm mulling it over and will probably see how she progresses this summer in therapy. 

Thursday, May 14, 2009

the house where no one is sleeping

That is our house right now. I blame these 3.

Madeline is still not sleeping at night. We went into the pedi this week, she has never seen this severe of insomnia in a child at age 6. She is consulting with other docs for us. The other thing she could suggest was sending her to my mom's house for  few nights because the only time in 6 weeks that Madeline has slept through the night was there. So we tried that this week, she slept through the night there one night, and was up the other two. 

This little guy is one noisy boy! He wakes everyone up with his nursing, even asleep he makes all sorts of noises which then wakes up the other two children. So starting last night, Ryan moved back downstairs with both the girls. It didn't go as bad as we expected, Gabrielle was upset for one minute and then climbed in bed and went to sleep. We'll see how tonight goes since Madeline will be here then. Naptime is also interesting because I have to hold Gabrielle's hand while she goes to sleep. Only Julian wants to nurse, then he doesn't, then he squeaks and wakes her up. Yeah, everyone is quite grumpy here!

And this is the one picture I thought I'd never take of a child of mine! Julian has a binky and he loves it. It started out of sheer desperation. I've had two other carseat haters and I don't think I could survive a third, not with the amount of driving I have to do now days. Julian will happily ride ONLY with a binky, same goes for any sling or wrap, he has to have a binky before he will consider riding in it. He is also not a comfort nurser which is unfamiliar territory for me, he doesn't want the breast which is fine until I go to put him down and then once again he wants a binky. Sigh. Boys. 

Saturday, May 2, 2009

one week old

One week went by way too fast. Ryan returns to work on Monday, I am dreading it. He took 2 weeks off with Gabrielle but his office manager is out recovering from open heart surgery so one week will have to do this time. He is going to *try* to take one day off a week for a while though, we'll see if that actually happens. Julian is a content baby so far, hopefully he will stay that way! 

This pic was the only one that showed Julian's eyes. He came out so quickly and with such force that he broke blood vessels all in his left eye, face and neck. The ones on his skin looked like a rash, just red spots everywhere, they never did show up in pictures but were very visible to the eye. His eye looks better then it did but is still quite red on the sides. 

I didn't get any new stretch marks with him, just elongated ones that I already had. This is the first pregnancy where I got a linea nigra, and the first one where I'm still wearing maternity pants after baby was born. All my bigger clothes are still about 10+ lbs away from fitting so unless I want to buy new pants then I'll wear my maternity ones until I can squeeze into something else. 

I have been experiencing back pain since my labor with Julian, it feels like something is stuck. One trip to the chiro this week made it slightly better, but I'll probably need to go back a few more times to get complete relief. My labor with him was much more intense then with the girls, it was shorter, but that wasn't it. He was posterior, which I had no idea until after the fact obviously. In hindsight, I should of guessed, posterior babies like to hang out in one position, usually on the left or right side. Ever since he was big enough for me to palpate, he had been on my right side.

 I really don't recommend back labor by the way, highly painful compared to regular labor. In my other labors, once the contraction stopped, then the pain was gone, not the case this time. At times I couldn't tell if a contraction had stopped or not, the pain remained for some time. When I'd have contractions 2-3 minutes apart, I was still feeling the first one when the next one would come. It was only when they were 6 or so minutes apart that I could relax for a minute between them. I managed ok, was just more vocal when I never had been with other labors. I had to rock on my hands and knees, rubbing my face against the pool, but each contraction left me utterly drained. At the very end right before Julian was born, I had to have Ryan apply counter pressure to my back, it only helped ever so slightly, but any relief was very welcome. 

I was happy with my fishy pool. I much preferred it to the AquaDoula I used with Gabrielle. I did wish several times that it was wider but I blame my foot for that. My injury from a couple months ago still isn't completely healed and pushing or whacking it against the side of the tub wasn't always pleasant. Apparently I have a thing for foot injuries because Gabrielle stomped on my other foot the other day with a pair of heavy shoes and now that one is bruised and once again I am limping. Sigh. Anyway, the sides were sturdy enough to lean against, hang over, the bottom was cushy that being on my hands and knees wasn't uncomfortable. I will certainly use that pool again if other children come our way. 

Friday, May 1, 2009


Madeline has been taking gymnastics for 2 years now. It quickly became her favorite activity, one that she excels at. One sentence I didn't envision myself saying was, "No practicing cartwheels down the street or parking lot."

I was getting ready to ask that she be moved up to more advanced classes when her anxiety started last summer. Instead I had to ask that I be allowed in the gym with Madeline so she could continue to take classes. Early this year I asked the head coach to move her up and was told that none of those classes were appropriate for my child. The only interaction Madeline or I had ever had with that coach had been when I asked to attend the classes with her for a period of time.
Madeline just completed another 8 weeks session of classes, this time her coach was the only only coach at the gym that can move children up in levels. I was told on the last day of class that Madeline needs to be in the next level and should of been moved some time ago. Finally! 
She started taking classes two days a week this year, but it was piecing together a tumbling/trampoline class and then an advanced beginner girls class. Now she will go 2 days a week year around to an intermediate class. Madeline is thrilled that she finally gets to learn some new skills. And in this class, she can continue to move up, before we reached the limit of what I could enroll her in without a coach's approval. 
Gabrielle loves trying to copy her big sister, and begs to "go too". When she turns 3, she can take classes by herself. Before then there are only classes where I have to attend as well, not happening with other children around. 
Until then, I make sure I take her to the open gym that the gym has every Friday during the school year. She has a little friend that she meets there, they run around holding hands and playing on the equipment. It is too cute.