Wednesday, June 24, 2009

children pics

Nice shot of Julian's double chin!

Madeline has been busy wiggling another loose tooth in hopes that it will fall it soon and she will get more money....

Working like Daddy.

Monday, June 22, 2009


This is what we got to do over the weekend. 

Once a year, Thomas comes to our local railroad for three days. And since I have a 2 year that adores all things train, we had to go. 

We have one of the few remaining coal power steam engine railroads left. What was once a vital link to the outside world for Durango is now a tourist attraction and an obsession for a toddler. We see the train going though town often and she screams every time she thinks she hears the whistle. 

The regular train ride to Silverton is a very painfully slow adventure that I will not take with children, but short 30 minutes trips like Thomas and Polar Express are perfect. 

Ryan as he always is with a phone glued to his ear.

The tracks go through town and then along the river.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

the new smile

She is quite proud of her first lost tooth. We are not counting the other two that were lost in a table vs. mouth accident several years ago! 

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Haven't we been down this path before?

Apparently it doesn't matter. We are doing therapy yet again with Madeline for anxiety. Last time I saw no improvement but that was with a different clinic and this new one wants us to try it again with a professional that is trained in trauma. I want to scream at the thought of juggling 3 children and care for two of them weekly to take her into a clinic. As if keeping Gabrielle and Julian quiet in my own house 5 days a week for language therapy isn't fun enough. I didn't bother asking the hourly rate, I can guarantee it is over a hundred an hour though, it always is. If only my insurance would decide to cover any type of therapy then I'd be set. 

Monday, June 8, 2009

Julian is 6 weeks now. I've been thinking about how different my experience with him is then from last time with Gabrielle. Gabrielle was very ill by now, in the hospital, and O2 that we  wouldn't get rid of for 6 months. I looks at Julian and it is hard to believe it is the same time frame. He is just so healthy with big fat cheeks. Gabrielle was wasting away when she was this age. I remember the day she turned 2 months old, I picked her up that morning and knew it was time to return to the hospital. She weighed exactly 8lbs, I could feel every bone in her spine, her skin just hung off her body. Julian is so round, I can't feel any bones on his body that is sure! It is sad to think about how different it could of been had Gabrielle not been exposed to pertussis. 

Julian and Gabrielle at 6 weeks. 

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

too good to be true

I had the appointment today with other physiologist. After waiting for a while, I find out they failed to mention to me that this appointment was not with the doctor, he doesn't even see patients at that center. This was intake appointment for me to give them a small amount of personal history, less then 20 minutes, and then fill out paperwork to see if I could move on to the next step. Next week Ryan and I have to meet for an hour with the family assessment director. After that appointment then we get put on the waiting list for the doc. Nice, huh. 

I've been warned that this doc is med happy, I decided lying in bed last night that is not a bad thing. Madeline's sleep has slightly improved, but I'm started to see the old anxiety return. Julian had an upset tummy last night, I wasn't able to lay down with Madeline when she wanted to go to bed (usually I just go to bed at the same time as her), to say she was upset is an understatement. She cried and cried because I couldn't lay there and touch her foot. She was too scared to go to sleep. We've been dealing with her anxiety for over 10 months now. We've done months of therapy, spent thousands on it because our insurance refuses to cover it, there was no improvement with the therapy. What gave us the greatest improvement was the listening therapy we did at the Star Center. I have all the equipment for it, we had to buy it, so I'm going to start that up again. If we get offered medication for her anxiety though, I'm going to accept it. Madeline already has enough strikes against her, she deserves some bit of normal in her life.